Renovation Rendezvous

Ahh France, all that space, rolling green fields, acres of smiling happy sunflowers; corn swaying in the breeze and the lure of a falling down crumbly barn to renovate. 

Happy sunflowers








Having decided to leave the idyllic island of Gozo, which had been our home for the last four years, Steve and I are now in Southern France, more specifically in the Midi-Pyrenean region. There are several reasons for us being here, one of them being that we, like many other stalwart Brits before us, fancy a renovation project. I can almost hear the collective intake of breath from those of you who know about such things. Many of you may even be wincing in advance, sure in the knowledge that this can only end in tears. You may be right, but undeterred by all the horror stories that accompany such ventures, we set out yesterday on our first day of house hunting.

We headed for the Dordogne; ahh the space, the rolling green fields, the acres of happy smiling sunflowers – oh sorry, we’ve established that already.

We had four appointments, all made via one estate agent. Our specifications were clear;

-      It MUST be detached – what with Steve being so anti-social and all J

-      It MUST be fairly isolated – we don’t want to annoy the neighbours with our music

-      It has to be under a certain budget

-      Etc etc

Clear? I thought so; sigh.

The night before, I began making my list. I am a list person, I love lists, my life is ordered by lists; I find lists disturbingly satisfying as I tick things off them, safe in the knowledge, that if it’s ticked off the list – all will be well. I had called to Steve as I wrote and ticked;

“Did you put the battery in the new camera?”

Now to be fair, he didn’t actually answer me, but as I’d seen him playing with the new camera and as I’d charged the batteries for it, I just assumed ……… BIG mistake.

A day trip out for us is akin to launching the Titanic. With this in mind, I packed my trusty red rucksack for the journey and with my lengthy checklist in hand, ticked things off as they disappeared into the seemingly bottomless miracle of a bag.

Like Mary Poppins bag, I can fit an amazing amount of stuff in here

Walkie Talkies – check

Phones x 3 – check

Details of all houses, maps, phone numbers etc – check

Baby wipes for my OCD need to have clean hands before I eat – check

Brand new camera – check

2^nd backup camera “in case” – check

Sat Nav – check

Picnic – this is a whole separate list all on its own – check

Money – check

Okay, we’re all set.

We opened the door to load up the Land Rover and were met with the dismal sight of clouds hanging low in the sky. Steve sniffed the air like a gun dog, “I think it’s going to rain” he declared solemnly, “Do you want to put the raincoats in?”.

Now, let me explain; in the UK, we had bought 2 lovely rainproof jackets of great quality. They were half price in the Debenhams sale, so silly not to have them. I did question whether or not it was cheesy to have matching jackets, and having been told no, we bought them. They were now hanging in the wardrobe in the spare room. The problem I had was this; the last time I went in that wardrobe, the biggest blackest, hairiest spider in the universe had emerged, and peeved at the disturbance had, to my trained eye, headed straight for me. I had retreated squealing from the room, returning broom in hand to deal with him. Trouble was, he’d gone. Of course that meant that he was still in there somewhere, no doubt in my rain jacket pocket, just waiting for revenge. I was therefore less than enthusiastic to get the jackets.

Steve's lovely Maine Jacket, which didn't make the trip

“I’m sure it won’t rain” I said with more conviction than I felt. Steve raised an eyebrow and I put my jeans and fleece in the car “just in case”. Steve was in shorts and t shirts and as a man denied a rain jacket, did not take “just in case” clothing.

Off we went, bright and early, with me secretly wondering how I would manage without coffee for the next 100 miles.

We had driven about 10 miles when the sky turned black. Steve cocked an eye upwards, “It’s going to rain” he mused. I sat nervously, thinking about the warmth and dryness of those jackets back in the wardrobe, but then remembered that there was undoubtedly a spider in my pocket, and said nothing. Of course, it did rain, in fact, the heavens opened and it positively threw it down in buckets. I looked out of my window and tried to find the words, but none came. Maybe it was better left unsaid. In the end, it got the better of me and I laughed, “Sorry about the raincoats” I managed. “Hmmm” said Steve tactfully not mentioning the fact that I had already wriggled in to my “just in case” warm clothes, and on we went.

The Over Priced One

We were seeing the first property without the benefit of an agent as one was not available. We managed to locate it, set just off the main road. Thankfully, the rain had stopped, though it was pretty soggy underfoot; we got out, looked at it, shook our heads, and got back in. This was not the house for us. Seriously overpriced and too small to boot, this was not the one.

Nice, but way too expensive

Break Time

Undeterred, we drove the 30 miles to the next rendezvous. We were early, and so took the time to explore the lovely little village of Mareuil. We came upon a huge old chateau and decided it would make a great photo. I jumped out of the Land Rover, brand new virgin camera in hand, switched it on and stared in bewilderment. Nothing happened. Must be me I thought and tried again; no, nothing. I went back over to the Land Rover, “You did put the new battery in this camera didn’t you”? I asked Steve. He looked only slightly shame faced as he admitted that no, in fact he hadn’t. Ah well, good job I have a “just in case” camera as well as “just in case” clothes!

Luckily I had my "just in case" camera with me

We had coffee in a pizzeria and wandered around thankful of the sun, which had finally deigned to shine. We bought a baguette and a pastry from a local boulangerie and sat in a small park, sharing with one of the feral cats there. I don’t know who was more shocked, me or the cat as Steve is NOT a cat person and as a rule does not pick off morsels of ham for them on demand.

Coffee in the pizzeria

A chocolatine in the park

Well, we've all got to eat 

The Factory

On to the second property, a disused factory, just out of the village. It had potential, as it was a blank canvas, ready for someone to come and make their mark on it. We noticed the second property right behind it and were told that this was also for sale from the same owners. We spent a good hour poking around and seeing that if purchased together, they would make a splendid place to live with plenty of space for a pool or even a gite. The only drawbacks were that, there was a shared drive with another house behind us, and it was next to some kind of auto repair shop. Hmm, not exactly the isolation we had asked for; nope, this wasn’t going to be the one either.

Potential? Oui

And I thought WE had a lot of stuff!

A great prospect, but not the one

The Brambly Barn

We then travelled 30 miles north to meet another agent and follow her to the next property, an old barn with over an acre of ground. We pulled up at the side of the road, and followed the pointed finger of the agent, “There it is” she said helpfully. We looked in unison across a field where indeed stood an old barn. “Err, how do we get to it”? I asked, stating the obvious question. “You can’t” replied the agent seriously, “The access is all overgrown”. We looked and agreed that it would take Prince Charming with his trusty sword to hack through the brambles and briars that had grown up across the entrance, and so all we could do was stare at it from 500 yards distant.

There it is - get your binoculars out

“What’s that house right next door?” I enquired, seeing a newly built red brick bungalow, which most certainly was not in the photograph I had. “Oh that went up really quickly” offered the agent mournfully, “When we took the photos, that was just a foundation; they built it really quickly”. 

Where's Prince Charming when you need him? A sea of brambles

“It kind of towers over the barn doesn’t it?” I noted with a hint of disappointment. Nope, this wasn’t the one. Ah well, it made us smile.

The Crumbly Barn

We then followed the same agent to the really pretty village of St Aulaye to see another barn. I had high hopes for this one. L shaped and set in half an acre of its own grounds, it was just on the outskirts of the village, and a total renovation project. Reasonably priced and within our budget, this was one I had secretly thought might be “the one”.

Such high hopes for this one

As we entered into the courtyard, I commented on the numerous outbuildings, which were attached, or which formed part of the little complex. The agent stepped up and consulting her papers said, “Ahh yes, but this bit here is not included, and err, let me see, ah yes, neither is this bit”. She pointed to 2 parts of the property, one of which was attached to the main building, and one, which was attached to an outbuilding.

But the L shaped bit on the end ...... that's not included!

I stared in disbelief, “What do you mean, these bits aren’t included”? I asked incredulously, “They’re attached to it”. The agent looked almost surprised as she answered me, “Yes, I know” she said in an annoyed tone, which offered sympathy to me, “It’s the way it is here sometimes”. I took a breath and chose my words carefully. “Well, that’s disappointing” I said calmly, “Especially after I specified that we would only consider a detached property, and in reality, this isn’t detached”. More sympathetic noises were made as we made our way, disillusioned, back to the Land Rover. Nope, not the one.

Lovely big garden, but it wasn't to be

The Old Corn Mill

The agent then told us that she had another property she could show us, but warned that it did have a holiday home attached on one side. However, it was a huge barn with massive potential and while it was out of our price range, we were assured that the owner would take a drop, quite a considerable drop. Okay, nothing to lose, lead on.

The barn was just outside Aubeterre, which is in the Charente region. Our first reaction on seeing this ex corn mill was “WOW”. It was massively impressive and could not fail to make you sit up and take notice. But was it a contender? Could we really pull this off and renovate such a enormous building? It had land, an attached office, and so many features, which would make it a unique and interesting property, once renovated.

WOW, what a possibility for someone, sadly not us

Renovate THAT - it would take a small fortune

However, it did have a small complex of gites and holiday homes next door, one of which was attached. I could only imagine the neighbours faces once Steve began drilling, hammering and generally disturbing their expensively paid for, peace and quiet. 

This photo gives you a sense of scale, it makes Steve look tiny

Did I want to buy it? Yes I did, but at the outset of this venture, we agreed that we would NOT fall into the trap of paying too high a price for a piece of real estate, only to run out of cash to make it habitable. So many people have made this mistake, and we are determined not to fall into this trap. Having looked over the corn mill, Steve estimated that it would cost over and above our budget to renovate it, which was a great shame as it was the best property of the day, but nope, it wasn’t the one.

We set off for home having learned a great deal and with new ideas. Eager to gauge what Steve thought about all the properties, I asked him, “So, what do you think? Are any of them worth putting an offer on?” He was silent for a few minutes, and then said, “I need to think about it”. I nodded; that was the wise thing to do, think about it, yes definitely, it needed thought. Well, he thought and he thought – all the way home. Once we got back and had our coffee in front of us, I asked again, “So? What do you think?” Silence reigned supreme. I got up to make us something to eat, allowing him space to gather those thoughts of his, which can be so difficult to part with. The minutes ticked by until I could wait no longer, “Do you think” I asked hesitantly, “That at any time soon, there might be some words spoken on this subject?”

Steve came out of his reverie, looked thoughtful and said “I’m still thinking”. The answer finally came through this morning – we won’t be putting an offer in on any of them.

Ah well, back to the drawing board ……………….. watch this space folks, I’ll keep you posted J

Freya